The Heart Can Not Be Discounted

You know, the dark doesn't make the bruises disappear.

It just makes them harder to see.

This is why it hurts the way it hurts.

You have too many words in your head. There are too many ways to describe the way you feel. You will never have the luxury of a dull ache.

You must suffer through the intricacy of feeling too much.

If it hurts you, if not being who you want to be kills you inside, just close your eyes and remember:

"Somewhere else, I'm something else.

Somewhere else, I'm something else."

And soon you will be here.

Soon, you will be you.

xoxo,

June

I just had a happening memorable June which includes a lot of pack and unpack. BKK trip was the 1st one actually. Anyway, let me summarize what I've been doing lately.

1) Went to Singaland with family at the beginning of the month. Had a 3D2N stay. We stayed in the Festive Hotel which located at Sentosa Island. Basically we just spent our time at Universal Studio on the second day and dinner at Vivo mall.

Stepmum, #fatgirl, stepsis, daddy Wong

2) Once I touched down KL, I need to get ready and organise my laundry as I have to rush down to Johor after resting a day at home. This round trip is to spend quality time with my mum and family but unfortunately, I only managed to stay over a week as I have shoots and I promised to attend a birthday girl's party.

Stepbro, #newhaircut, beautiful mum (left out 1st stepbro and stepdad, next time)

3) I sat on a bus alone for the very first time in my life. Which is scary and... fun? haha... True, I found it quite fun but what's scary is I scare the driver will drive recklessly. Thank God I met a good driver that day. As usual, I got a full-time driver, Mr. Lee to fetch me from TBS and rushed down to Elaine's pre-birthday party at The Pool.

#spotmymachoman, moi, birthday girl

4)  Got a sad new on that night itself where grandpa called at the unusual time at 11pm+ telling me that my grandaunt (his only younger sister) passed away. She's tough and never gone into any medication, and she leave the world like that. Leaving her husband (grand uncle) who needs to wash his kidney every 2 days in the world. My 1st time seeing grandpa tears and he cried real hard. This is saddening. So, I've followed them back to Butterworth to attend the funeral ceremony for 3D2N on the next day.

Farewell, grandaunt. You'll be missed. =')

5) Rested for a couple of days and it's time for a girls bounding session a.k.a. celebrating Elaine's birthday. Zengie managed to book Ciao and we had a great and pleasant dinner.

Zen, Elaine, moi

6) After 20th, I finally got some rest and spend some quality time with grandma. Had a reunion dinner on "dumpling" day. However, I started to feel anxious bout my results after a coursemate app me that the results will come out on my birthday date. It is going to be a memorable one. Grrr... But who know the results came out on the 27th so thank God, but still, I have to re-sit for my accounting paper which I've knew that I'll be going to the referrals. Guess what, it's only one mark to passing mark. DAMN.

7) After all the hectics pack&unpack and saddening news, here comes my biggest surprise in my life. Babe Erica asked for dinner and I choose the place but I'm not sure who and how many of them are going, I leave this hectic problem to them because after my grandaunt case, I just hope for happiness and have a simple life. I don't need a well-planned grand celebration. What I want is I don't wanna be lonely on that special day but I'm left alone at home for the whole day except night and I get really emo.

But thank God, I have such beautiful friends and boyfie who actually purposely plan it that way so I'll cry on the 29th's surprise party.

FYI: According to my grandma, my actual date is 29th of June but the nurse mistaken the date and stated 28th instead. So I always assumed that I'm the queen for these 2 days. =P

On the 28th,

 At the 2 weeks old Marini's on 57 (next building of Mandarin Oriental, park your car there and walking distance is like 1 min or less) which you'll get to view the marvelous view of the Twin Towers ______________ this near. Okay, not that near but the nearest that you can get to. Too bad the restaurant opens in July or else we'll be dining in already but there're pasta, tapas and side dishes to order at the bar.

Group photo, thanks for coming! ;D

 Biggest surprise of the night! Tried hard to hold my tears back when I saw her. Thanks baby V!

And not forget to mention that the one who made me burst into tears on that night was Juneebaby. Facetime all the way from Adelaide. She's part of the team who planned these plans too. Love u!

On the 29th,

Birthday dinner at Frangipani

Then, I message them to come out for 2nd round after my dinner, they rejected me and I sort of emo but still ok la, I have my boyfie with me. He said he knew where to bring me to and yea, to the surprise party at Traders Hotel.

 I am bursting into tears

 BURSTED!

You guys are the best!

 Boyfie got me a KLCC view!

 And a big GIANT CARD!

Effortless drawings and decorations.

 Thanks to Nicole, Leon, Elaine and Nick for blowing these beautiful balloons! =D

I guess this post is the summarize of my happening month.

Till then.

xoxo,

Lose in order to gain.

Win me over with your words, lose me with your actions.

When I was at the deepest mode, you were filled with happiness.

Ended up, while you're struggling, I've survived.

So you think you could be fine by comforting by your philosophy while I've covered up with laughters and happiness.

I've used to cover up with nice photos to hide what's beyond the story in the photos tell. Well, I no longer use these photos to hide anymore, I use them to tell what's real instead.

So sorry that I once held on too much and too long, wasted both of our precious time.

Of course, I don't wish that you wasted others too.

Since we found our own happiness now, I sincerely wish you good but sorry, I can forgive but not forget what I've struggled and been through so much in the past.

No, pls don't misunderstand. I've let go completely and I can be fine with your current happiness but I should have respect my current happiness too.

Respect is the principle that I've been holding all these while, although I'm once not being respect at all.

I've enough of falling down. Here's the new starting point.

Thank God for leaving me the best to go through my highest peak of my life.

xoxo,

Dear King,

I still couldn't believe what had happened last night.
Warmth. Touched. Blessed. Teared with happiness.

This, is what you sent me last year.

And you just made it happened. I feel so grateful to have you.
Thank you. The only words that I wanted to utter repeatedly.
You've done so much for me and I really appreciate for things that you've did for me.
I guess I'm the luckiest girl to be with you right? As I'm being told that I'm the only girl that you would do and plan so much for a girl.
By the way, I would like to apologise for putting temper on you last 2 nights ago. I didn't know that this is part of the plan. I'm sorry. =D

You made my world beautiful.

I appreciated for every tiny bits you've done.

I love you. I really had a blast these 2 nights. 

And lastly, I wanna thank you for spending so much to put on the best memory in my life, I feel so much guilt and heartache.

What touches me most is your efforts and caring.

You're the best of my best! =D

xoxo,

Left things undone

At this moment, I still can't figure out what I should feel.
Today, it was supposed to be a busy beautiful day.
Oh well, it was totally opposite what I've planned 2 years ago.
Some of the besties are not here with me, boyfie is facing his test in few days time, no girly outings as all of them are working or not free.
I had a lonely birthday night last year where I'm left alone at home.
And I guess I like that kind of feeling now. I dislike celebrating my birthday.

However, I have these lovely friends who insisted to have a dinner with me tonight.
I did a short research and passed them 2 of the restaurants, asked them to choose one. I don't even know how many of them are going.
They've been asking me what I want for my present. I want nothing. Like seriously.
Reason of why I don't wanna plan for any celebration on this big day is because of I go for perfection when it comes to some big planned days. So in order to avoid getting disappointments, I choose to put 0% of expectation today.


Let's leave all these things undone but I reckon that I'll be regretting for not fulfilling this wish.

Beautiful scar

From every wound, there's a scar, and every scar tells a story, a story that says:

I survived.

This story has been mended in my heart for almost a year and whenever the story lines remind my mind, my heart will eventually put me back into the story line.

There're different characters playing their own role,

and some left because of the story's ending and I let 'em leave.

However, time brought the characters back united and another brand new story begun.

From pain to a scar,

I'm glad to have this story with me although it ended with a bad ending.

This scar is the most beautiful scar that I ever had from God.

From scar to survival,

Thanks to the soul mate who keeps encouraging me.

Most importantly, I survived happier than before.

xoxo,

Rest of the Days in BKK

Hola, been away to Singapore these few days so this post has been delayed a bit and this post will be full of pictures.

Basically, my main purpose of this trip is shop till I dropped but pity the boyfie who has been pulled by me to walk, pay and take the shopping bags for 3 days. 

So, not much pictures in the rest of days because I was busy'ing shopping in my shopping paradise. =D

Slept late on the night before because boyfie has to study for his AA's test on July. /kelian

Luckily the hotel's breakfast buffet has been extended to 11am and we wake at 9.4xam. Get ready and rushed down to the restaurant. 

 

This is the sim card that I mentioned in the previous post. Show this to the 7-11 sales person. Not all of them selling this sim card. Credits to Missy Joc dearie. =D

Our room's view. Good morning!

Got no choice but to turn on the selca mode after he fell asleep from our breakie again.

After 2 hours, he's finally awake and we head down to Siam again to check out PLAY CDG

At Siam Discovery

My love

Yours truly, I think I shall stop wearing this tee which make me look real FAT.

After getting our love, we headed to Platinum Mall, the largest wholesale shopping mall. Information girl told us we only need 15mins walk from Siam to the mall and we walked and it took us almost half an hour to reached. By right, we can walk on the linked bridge from Siam BTS station instead of the roadside and get sunburn. =,=

My ah sai & my body guard. LOL

Me wants to go to the floating market but I choose to stick to my main purpose. =P

Night market

Omelette rice. IMBA TASTY

Pork "satay". Boyfie couldn't resist this but not me, who don't eat pork.

We can finally sit down and eat. SHoo hungry.

Keep complaining how crazy I am buying all those stuff and he's exhausting.

After 8 hours of walk and stand.

Back to our room and the pictures tell. (Baby Nikon got a bit delayed)

My happy man. HAHA

Got broke on the 2nd day.

The next morning (3rd day), as usual. I selca when he's sleeping.

 Dry lips

 Couple pic of the day 

 This guy who spoilt me like a queen.

Went to Platinum Mall again, shopped for hours and had some snacks in McD.

Back to our hotel room and the love wanted to go to gym. He can't live without exercises. So here we are.

 Clean headset, used headset, complimentary water and towel. =D

 What's yours?

 My macho man.

 The lazy bum who only did a 150 sits-up and rest. /phailed

 13kg dumbbell each side? If I'm not mistaken.

 You can actually online while cycling or jog on them.

Our dinper.

On the 4th morning, last day of hunting babeh!

As usual, went to Platinum Mall again. Didn't know that there's another side of building, so emo nemo. We still thought we've shopped the whole building already but mehhh.... There're 2 more buildings. Anyway, I'll be back after I have enough of savings again. ;)

 Finally found an official real massage centre in Central World shopping mall. Highly recommended for their superb massage service.

Rushed back to our room for a quick night swim! Don't bother to remove the make up too cause we left like 45 mins to swim. Jeng jeng.. 1st swim with boyfie. 

 Shower and start packing!!

 Our shoes stored in this hand carry luggage bag to prevent overweight baggage. haha!

 So messy messy.

 Pack pack

 So sorry, I don't have the effort of putting everything out on the bed and snap a pic of what I've bought, I can only show you these cause I am mad exhausted already.

 Dinner. =)

Checked-out on the 5th day and let me show you the design of this hotel. 

 I personally love their classy yet simply design.

 Lounge

 Reception

What's good is they don't force you to go for their limo service and they offered a cab service instead. That means we can decide to call for cab or limo service. Just remember you must have the small change or else the taxi driver won't change for you but no worries, you can always break your big note with the exchange currency counter. It's just that the taxi driver has to wait and give you a "beh-song" face. We met this situation on the last day and I asked boyfie to pay me extra 50bath to ease the driver's bad mood.

Don't forget to leave some money for the airport's shopping paradise. Their duty free shopping mall is a bomb. We regretted for slacking around too long at the outside of the passport control counter. We did run in the airport to check-in into the departure room but the counter just started to open i think. LOL

 Boyfie was thrilled seeing all these planes lining up in a row. You can make it to the place, no worries love.

  Spot our plane.

 Bye Bangkok!

 Nasi lemak!! I really miss this after days of tom yum and spaghetti.

 Quick grab at BKK airport's Victoria Secret for only 6300bath.

I'm done with BKK trip posts now. 

Up next will be the family trip in Singapore!

xoxo,